Rants about Neethaane En Ponvasantham & A letter to GVM

   

 I didn’t intend to write this, but….. as Robert Downey Jr. quotes about Hulk’s nature in The Avengers movie, I am prone to anger management issues after watching a worst movie and in this case it is Neethaane En Ponvasantham movie (I prefer the title Neethaane En Piece of shit, it justifies my feelings towards 120 for ticket and 240 for popcorn bucket)

I'd a bad gut feeling about the movie after reading its caption 'This could be your love story'. The very moment I read this, I am sure that it will definitely be sucky and holy molly, I was damn right. Movie started with usual college song intro. The plot kick started from cultural day scene where our hero Varun meets his childhood pal Nithya after a longtime, post his Gonorrhea surgery. Right from that point, the audience was force fed pesticides and rolled down into a bizarre journey, a reminiscence of their check-in /check-out love story.

As kids they play in park & streets, as teens they goof around at school & math tuitions, as adolescents they date and get laid in UG days, as young adult they struggle, worry about their future by the end of their college days and finally during their mid 25’s, they undergo quarter life crisis, entering professional work life and screwing their own personal life, future and the minds of audience. This is the plot of NEP movie. Talk to me, who else hasn’t underwent these in your life?. GVM doesn’t have a story for this one and he always does this very old 25paise ‘Paambaati Paambu varuthu’ puppet show trick where he fools us by trying to replicate and portray our own lives and moments on screen under some breezy shades of blue in a beautiful fragrance with tip of the tongue cheesy English dialogues, back patting dad, caring siblings, jovial friends etc... But genetically modified hybrid reality doesn’t make an impact yo!

Rather than titling as ‘The moments from Varun & Nithyas love story’ GVM could’ve quoted as the ‘The menstrual period from Varun & Nithyas love story’ because both of them act and behave weird, immature, senseless, tensed, tired and stressed out throughout the movie in every phases of their so called love story. If someone utters that it’s the way the script is I’ll punch on your face coz there wasn’t such thing as scripted.

Santhanam, who is being added as a crowd pleasing material in all the shitty movies post 2010s, tickles our laughter bones at times but in parts. Jiiva’s originality in acting can be seen in some shots even though he was totally controlled and played by the hands of his puppet master but Samantha, my sweetie pie why you always dance or jump around or walk back forth or overact or look out of focus or put some maargazhi kolam in air with free hands and behave unstable in all shots chellam. I love you as the Jennifer Lawrence of Kollywood but you disappointed this Justin Beaver boy. We will take up acting classes together in future at Newyork, no?  *Singing baby baby baby oh oh oh !!*

On the musical note, Ilaiyaraja’s music was a big turn off. RR and BGM were pathetic. It hurts and even pains for me to write this but truth mustve been told that amateur music composers in short films and low budget feature were scoring really good than him. Ilaiyaraja music has really turned old school. ‘The Maestro’ can reserve his voice for spectacular Thiruvasagam, rare overseas concerts and occasional Yuvan’s singles.

GVM could’ve best kept his Ilaiyaraja fan-boy feelings and obsession just in the dialogue mentions and credits as he did in Vaaranam Aayiram, where Surya always quotes about Ilaiyaraja music when he gets turned on by Sameera Reddy, resulting in a boner. So many old songs, frequently heard tunes have been mercilessly attempted and the classics have been completely raped. I couldn’t remember it right now but  in theatre I felt it so many times. To quote some..‘Thendral vandhu theendum podhu’ from Avatharam, ‘Adi yaathi indha vayasula from Paruthiveeran, ‘Ada da vaa asathalam’ from sarvam has been used as a template for 3 tracks. The BGM and music in the second part was completely horrendous.  At places I felt myself as a tragic volunteer for some Sci-fi experiment titled ‘High distortion acoustics in unparalleled audiograms at brain damaging decibels’ (Definitely does sound way better than my engineering project title so patenting it).

                    

The dialogues were completely plastic, clichéd, and emotionless. English dialogues were forcefully stuffed, to try and sound like so called high society peter families does, which were evident in all GVM movies. There isn’t a one good line or dialogue to remember or feel about. The wannabe highly emotional scenes have been shot totally in wide frames and top angle. No close up for actors, meaningless wide angle shots. Edhukku Sir. I wonder that GVM took all those wide angle shots to match up and add comfortable dialogues later during recording.

                                                       ****A Letter to GVM*****

As 'Vaaranam Aayiram' Daddy advised to keep writing letter as it will make you feel good to read, use it when you ran out of tissue papers and cherish it in future, I am writting one for Gautham Menon along with few queries.

Dear GVM sir, 

You already have a descent fan-following for your films, without knowledge. I wish to mention a quote from 'The Dark Knight', my favorite Joker's line 'You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push'. Hope that makes sense. Please don’t try to be the next big thing in film industry. Why you attempt a wannabe Maniratnam from Mounaragam and Alaipaayuthey days or trying to create a new Alaigal Ooivadhillai of 2010s i.e. Vinnaithaandi Varuvaaya. Etc….Edhukku sir idhellam ?? Venam. Vitrunga. Vaarnam Aayiram paarthom. Edho rasithom. Porum. Mudiyala.

If you wish to boo your old puppy love and get her back, trying to sound like a relationship guru, playboy guitarist or a blue checked shirt specialist please try some other sources/medium/platform but not in the name of Cinema. Don’t sell this shit to audience in the form of movie. That’s bullshit. Cut this crap and go back to Minnale and Vettaiyadu Vilayaadhu days bro. Even those have been so cheesy but not like the recent ones for god sake.

P.S. I feel the urge and need to revamp myself in a GVM way. Do send me the details and specifics like name and address for the following. ‘Oppan GauthaMenon style’

1.       Apparel outlet store where I can get white Khadi shirt, plain blue shirt, Denim jeans, Slim-fit Khakis, checked shirt.
2.       Spa and salon for getting a sharp haircut, clean-shave, facial and whole body waxing for MALE.
3.       Spoken English class for enrolling myself, my mom, dad, brother, sister, close friend, GF, servant maid, homeless street kids etc.. Suggest one that gives a good deal as a package.
4.       From the crowd or a gang of girls, How to sort out and hit on arrogant chicks, self-proclaiming angel looking bitches, immature emo girls etc... Do I need to watch Twilight, Sex and the city or some Chick flicks ? DVD reccos plz.
5.       Moor market store name and titles of English novels that I should buy and stuff at my living room for the purpose of showoff in front of girls and guests at home.
6.       Music class address and Song tutor for all the on spot singing performances at school annual days & college culturals.
7.       Voice trainer to talk in fake accent for hiding my real personality. Damn! Not for the reasons Brue Wayne sounds in Batman suit but for the purpose of sounding artificially, aesthetically, abnormally, manly infront of chicks. Is Vijay TV Super singer fame Anant sir training your heroes for voice ?
8.       Personality development class conducted by bob cut Anglo Indian half sleeve Aayas and sexually starving trouser uncles. Gym instructor (the guy who trained surya 6 packs in 10 days) cell no. for fitness.
9.       Guitar vidhvaan or thambura master cell number for learning Classical Guitar from 2^nd  standard, to cuddle around guitar whenever I feel sissy.
10.   Dance school name and dance master address for performing ‘Group la Dupe’ dance in a single intro song. Note: Currently undertaking classes from Kala master.
11.   Map route for Engineering college admission office, Mechanical dept. HOD phone no., College hostel rent etc...
12.   Apartment broker website URL for booking flats and homes near ECR, Anna Nagar, Fisherman’s cove or Foreshore estate for personal reasons. *Winks*
13.   Laptop bag or Backpack brand name and rate quote.
14.   Torrent link for downloading Ilaiyaraja songs in MP3, MP4, WAV formats along with BGM, OST, RR, Single, Karaoke, Cappella versions etc..
15.   Woodland shoes model number and size.
16.    Place to shop or online purchase a Harry Potter Wand or a Neuralyzer from Men In Black to erase the memory of watching this movie.

Delay in response is ok. I can understand your busy at the success party of NEP movie. But do reply for all my queries and help a poor soul to shape up, be fit, talk english, dress blue and score completely infront of chicks.

Thanks & Regards,
Surya s/o Krishnan,
ECR Road Apartments,
Newyork, Central park, Times square, Wall street, Berkley, California, Chennai, Banglore.

                                                      *******End******

Planning to host an alternate title contest for the title ‘Nethaane En Ponvasantham’. Please fill your entries. Winners will be awarded Uncut, Unshot, Unedited, Unwritten, Undeveloped Bluray version of GVM’s yesteryear cult classic Nadunisi Naaigal. Bwaaaahhhh….

My entries goes like..

Nethaane En Pencil Dabba, Nethaane En Pantry cup, Nethaane En Piece of shit, Nethaane En Puberty, etc..

Come on. Post your entries …

Cloud Atlas - A Two face review

Disclaimer: This post contains plot spoilers. Do not read this if you haven' t watched or read Cloud Atlas.

If you completely liked, loved Cloud Atlas, read the protagonist version and shed out happy tears. 

If you totally disliked, hated, couldn't understand it, do read the Antagonist/ parody version. Sit back and have a fun read.

P.S. For a musical reading experience, play this cloud atlas sextet and read it. 

Cloud Atlas – Everything is connected. A Protagonist Version.

Cloud Atlas is a stunning hexaptych, a clandestine composite film. By hexaptych, I try to brand that cloud atlas is a classic renaissance painting filled with six panels or sections painted in a beautiful canvas (a silver-screen here), depicting  an anthology of six different stories- that are interconnected and entwined in multiple themes and highly sedative theories of life, love, birth, death, existentialism, spirituality, reincarnation, modernism, past life etc….

If the thematic essence of cloud atlas must be realized, understood and dwelled upon, one must be familiar having watched lots of films that deal with multi-layered screenplay, hyperlink cinema. If you are a voracious reader, and came across nested stories and interwoven narratives - thereby intriguing lot of fantasy elements in it, that definitely helps in understanding cloud atlas.

Hyperlink Cinema, which is multi-linear in a more metaphorical sense, is one among the best, revolutionary things that happened in the film genre. It started way long before the advent of color films, but its tremendous rise and popularity can be well noticed in the past two decades.

My personal favorites under Hyperlink cinema includes like Amores Perros, The Edge of Heaven, 21 Grams, Mulholland Dr., City of Gods, Memento, Pulp fiction, Babel, Sin city, Crash etc..

For understanding Cloud Atlas in high level, I would recommend you to watch ‘The Fountain’ by Darren Aronofsky, ‘Café De flore’ by Jean-Marc Vallée, ‘Hereafter’ by Clint Eastwood.  These are the films that came as Déjà vu and flashed in my visual cortex while watching Cloud Atlas. Moreover these were close enough to explain cloud atlas to some extent.

‘The Fountain’ is a simple love story, triple layered screenplay, with a single quest- spanning across the past, present and future. ‘Café De flore’ is a musical film with two layered plot- dealing with love and reincarnation. ‘Hereafter’ is a supernatural fantasy drama based on the lives of a psychic, a tsunami survivor and 2005 London tunnel bombing survivor.

 If you’ve seen these flicks, you can get to know that the plot is dealt and revolved around with characters and stories that grow up on a sequential, contiguous timeline- often moved through a single quest/ motto/ search. Cloud Atlas here breaks another record by taking a further leap by narrating six different stories in a complete disoriented timeline that spans over centuries and moved in multilevel patterns.

Plot: 

The plot goes on in a circular loop with an idiomatic context, not like ‘What goes around comes around’ but ‘What starts here ends here’. An old Zachry sitting in a sandy beach narrates the story of a voyager, whose incomplete journal lands up in the hands of a struggling sextet composer, who shares his music and love in the form of letters with his gay partner, who turns out to be a whistle-blower against a nuclear research. 

Ok I’ll pause here. *Takes deep breath and continues*.

Meanwhile an old publisher tries to escape from filthy money lenders, unwillingly ends up in an old-age home and plans for an escape. This story is seen in a cinematic format by a genetically-engineered fabricant (clone) in a dystopian future society, where she starts to rebels against the exploitation of her race. *Gulps Soda*

On a distant post-apocalyptic earth, Meronym, a member of futuristic civilization paves a visit to a tribal clan. The fabricant from the dystopian society is idolized and worshipped by this clan. Young Zachry helps Meronym to find cloud atlas that would send a signal to the people who live in the outskirts of earth.

Finally it ends, where it starts. We could see old Zachry finishing his story telling session in the beach and returns back home with old Meronym. Behind them, we can see a pale blue dot that represents the Earth. Pheww..

Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Hugo Weaving, Jim Sturgess makes their appearance in all these six stories with interesting roles. A character that plays a protagonist version in one film plays an antagonist in another. Circle of life. Period.

A single character in all the stories carries a birth mark which gives us a hint to observe the theme of transmigrating souls. Irrespective of the criticisms, Tom Tykwer and the Wachowskis has made the fellow critics and cinephiles awestruck by adapting the unadoptable novel. They have also left us open lots of loop holes, loose ends, knots and puzzle that can be observed, discussed and ranted by the fans.

Cloud Atlas will be hailed and studied in future. Seen it twice already and will see it n number of times, hoping that each and every viewing will add up and stir a better shake, compared to the previous viewing.

Just like Memento DVD that has a special cut which runs in a Chronological sequence, I hope that Tom Tykwer and the Wachowskis release a Chronological cut of Cloud Atlas. That cut should run these six stories in parts as 6 different short films, each spanning over 27 mins. Similar to the documentary ‘Room 237’ that explains the hidden concepts, theories and philosophies of Stanley Kubrick’s masterpiece ‘The Shining’, a documentary follow up must be made for Cloud atlas that explains the movie from lots of perspectives.

No wonder that this film received 10 mins of standing ovation in Toronto International Film festival. Watch Cloud atlas right away before some worst, cash grab, reboot/sequel movie steals the silver screen. Do watch this massive film in a big screen and get your minds blown in nanos. P.S. Don’t walk out near the end credits. Wait for it to roll out exposing the interesting character lineups. 

Cloud Atlas - 6/6

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cloud Atlas: An antagonist version.

How to Prepare cloud atlas ?

Take 6 individual stories from top 6 genres of all time. Interconnect them. Integrate these six stories with x pieces, differentiate them into y pieces with each chunk running a minute. Yes, it’s the goddamn calculus. Jumble the chunks in a non-linear sequence. Add more of philosophic ingredients. Screw the audience mind like the way editor got his head jagged in the edit table. Mix it and mash up like how masala poori is mixed with khatta, mheeta, jeera and dhahi. Serve it plateful. Yeppie. Cloud Atlas is ready to eat.

Let’s see about these six stories in detail. I couldn’t recollect these six titles easily. So I renamed it for my comfort and understanding. Here it goes…

The Slave and the Sea:

Just like OC/BC/MBC/SC/ST quota in engineering colleges, there will be separate quota in Academy Awards every year under all categories of nominations. 

White helps black, superior helps inferior, dick helps douche- such types. You can find this in films like The Help, Hotel Rwanda, Blood Diamond, Schindler’s list etc… This is one such story.

On a Gold rush, a white guy finds a slave in his deck and helps him, fights for his right. Boo. 

Musical letters of a bi-sex(ual)tet composer:

In every film festivals you can find this type of film, which explains and explores the world of homosexual people, Incest- their life, love, pain and struggle. This is one such story.

An amanuensis for a musical composer struggles to compose a cloud atlas sextet. He shares his experiences and thoughts with this gay partner through letters. Finally kills himself with pain and regret. 

The Diving bell and the Journalist:

Erin Brockovich, The Insider, Whistle blower, Witness Protection Program, State of Play.

Journo facing and escaping all barricades to safeguard the truth..Meh.

Not a superhero script, but this is another single hero/ heroine where the lead will decode the entire conspiracy, the hidden mystery, the mythical mattresses, the lost sauce packet, the unfried finger chips etc… This may not be a serious script, but definitely wins box-office, Home DVD sales and big roles for the lead actors.

Oldies day out:

Movies like Prison Escape, A man escaped, Shawsank Redemption - dealing with a single guy or a group escaping a lockup, can be juxtaposed with movie scripts in which people are trying to get out of a mental asylum. Eg. One flew over cuckoo’s nest, K-Pax, Shock corridor etc..

A bunch of old, unfunny douchebags figures to escape an old-age home and executes it. On the verge of getting caught, they finally escapes. *Yawns* *Skips to next plot*

Do watch ‘It’s a kinda funny story’. It’s the young version of it and its really funny.

The White knight rises:

Minority Report, Terminator, Artificial Intelligence, Avatar, Bicentennial Man, Fabricants, Cyborg, The Island, Surrogates, Daydreamers, Transformers.

Our greedy human race has become even filthier in a so-called dystopian future society. Just like exploiting nature, feminism, freedom and democracy, human race has ended up exploiting fragments (clones) too in such futuristic society. Under the leadership of a clone named Sonmi 451, they rebel against the human race condemning the totalitarian state.

So basically, we mess with these clones, fabricants, machines, cyborgs etc.. and they fight us back. *Bitch Please*

Apocalypto & Co. meets the Star wars:

Cow Boy meets aliens, Harry Potter meets twilight, Spiderman meets Joker.

Makes sense ? Well that’s the whole point of this story.

This chapter is an epic facepalm. It simply reminded me of Wall-E movie where the fatso captain sits in-front of a big computer googles about earth and family. Eva coming down to earth in search of a plant, meets Wall-E, befriends and use him. Imagine the apocalyptic Tom hanks as Wall-E and White dressed Halle Berry as Eva. Wall-E helps Eva and he worries about the abandoned earth, while fighting with its own inner ego and demon.

Did you guys get the logic? Its fucking same. Goddamn !!

Too many CG, racist/worst makeups, multiple roles, lots of theories, 6 different stories with a mediocre hope that at least one story will satisfy audience in an individual manner. So there is nothing great about cloud atlas. It just like Andhra Meals or masala movies which has all spices, sweets, starters, main course, salads, desserts, Intro songs, fight, love, romance, family sentiments etc.. Even though it will make us feel full, it often gives us big headache, stomach pain, nausea and diarrhea. 

One can even consider watching Cloud Atlas as a 'Navarathri' screening, in which 6 films were played in a row the whole night to stay awake. Go for cloud atlas by telling yourself that you are gonna watch 6 films for the price of one.

P.S. If someone advise me to read the book, Ill punch and gift you 'Twilight' and '50 shades of grey' anthology. That’s what I call it as an epic. Damn you all cloud atlas likers !!

'Kshay' Movie Review - Classy, bold and brilliant

Kshay (Corrode) – directed by Karan Gour

Obsession – When you don’t know why you like it and want it, but still you madly need it.

Kshay is the typical portrayal of middle class people in our modern society. By looking at the high class people's lifestyle, the way the middle class people dreams about the money, wealth and fame is far beyond comparison. What Karan Gour has done with Kshay is classy, bold and brilliant.

If ‘Avatar’ plot can be compared or related to the fight of nations for natural resources, concepts of Hinduisms, Neyitri's character as mother nature etc., Kshay’s  plot can be compared with the struggling Indian middle class, their obsession towards wealth in their day-to-day lives. Arvind, a hard working family guy, struggles for the completion of an unfinished construction. He fights with his contractor who loots a portion of his monthly wage consistently. Chhaya, a typical middle class house wife gets obsessed with Hindu Goddess Laxmi's statue, which is far beyond her need and scope of owing it.

Hit by a stone on her cheek, Chhaya walks with a scar the whole movie, which she ironically carries as the bandwagon status that the society imprints on the face of middle class. When goddess Laxmi’s statue flashes in front of her face, she gets the glimpse of wealth, a hope and a leap of faith. With lot of factors drawing and captivating her to own the Laxmi statue, she attempts desperately to buy the statue at any cost- yes, AT ANY COST. What will be the heights of extremity that she will reach to get it, lies the plot which is so obsessive in depicting the levels of craziness and insanity.

In Kshay, black and white texture has been well chosen and used at its best, along with the natural lighting. To picturize obsession, not necessarily one needs glorious colors to portray it. Colors are not needed in detail for a subject, to get obsessed with. Entire film lies in Chhaya's obsession in acquiring the Laxmi statue. The texture of black and white draws us well to feel her obsessiveness. The haunting background score blends well with traumatizing cuts, composed and edited by Karan Gour himself.

It’s unfair to compare our very own Indie filmmakers with others. But, If Q, the director of the Indie movie Gandu (2010 SAIFF winner) was termed as the ‘Gaspar Noé of India’, then Karan Gour has every right to be called as the ‘Lars von Trier of India’. What Darren Aronofsky and Danny Boyle did with addiction in ‘Requiem for a Dream’ and ‘Trainspotting’, Karan Gour does the same with obsession in Kshay.

I felt some sorts of Lars von trier’s ‘Antichrist’ moments while watching Kshay. The scene where Chhaya worries to Arvind about her miscarriage (the stunning, slow, steady, b&w prologue scene from Antichrist where the baby falls and the couple worries later), the tree art in the boy’s T-shirt at the statue shop (the same tree under which Antichrist duo make love, with satanic images around them in delusive sots), the way Chhaya hears and feels certain strangeness in and around her home (when Antichrist heroine hearing voices and whispers around the woods).

Kudos to Karan Gour & team for making Kshay possible amongst all odds. Kshay is a pure work of passion and a genuine piece of art. Art, at its highest level of obsessiveness swinging to-and-fro the eyes of the ultimate observer. The best psychological thriller I have seen in this year so far.

Go and grab a copy of Kshay DVD right away to immerse in the world of obsession.

You can watch the full movie online from youtube, Officially. Click Here

If you love to watch black and white films drooling all the way, check out my list of ‘Top 20 favorite B&W films’ so far. Few films in the below list has its plot dealing with certain type of psychological condition, not Intentional though. To my surprise I found this only after making this list.

1.       Breathless by Jean-Luc-Godard,

2.       The General  by Buster Keaton,

3.       High noon by Fred Zinnemann,

4.       It’s a wonderful Life by Frank Capra,

5.       The bicycle Thieves by Vittorio De Sica,

6.       All about eve by Joseph L. Mankiewicz,

7.       Apu Trilogy by Satyajit Ray,

8.       Seven Samurai by Akira Kurosawa,

9.       Mr. Hulot’s Holiday by Jacques Tati

10.   Persona  by Ingmar Bergman

11.   12 Angry Men by Sidney Lumet,

12.   Sunset Boulevard by Billy Wilder,

13.   Following by Christopher Nolan,

14.   Polytechnique by Denis Villeneuve,

15.   Pi by Darren Aronofsky,

16.   Modern Times by Charlie Chaplin,

17.   The Artist by Michel Hazanavicius,

18.   Manhattan by Woody Allen ,

19.   Le Trou (The Hole) by Jacques Becker,

20. Brief Encounter by David Lean.

Mugamoodi - My Thoughts

The movie starts with this below quote.

“As you think, so shall you become.” – Bruce Lee. 

Yes, agreed..

But while thinking, do remember,

"Your mind is the scene of the crime". – Christopher Nolan

I want to confess my thoughts, predictions, premise and conclusions that I felt while watching the film.

Right from the beginning, everything seemed odd rather offbeat. Mysskin boasting about the fights and techniques used in the film, the possible ways that he was going to make a lineup of sequels, 12kg super-hero suit, actors learning martial arts and stuff. Like most of you, I thought this is either going to suck money in the blatant name of martial arts (like Surya's 7aam Arivu) or its going be a desperate attempt to make a super-hero movie from a Hollywood flick. Great snakes, to my surprise it was a compost of both and the viewers were royally screwed.

I am a big fan of Mysskin right from his debut movie Chitiram Pesudhadi. I still remember the excitement and slowly building seriousness and tension while watching Anjaathey. I pretty much liked the desi-Kikujiro (Nandhalaala) and Yuddham sei. But, Mugamoodi ….. I CAN’T BARE !!!

Curtains rose at the multiplex screen, along with my expectations. Once the villain was shown and the first shot faded to, sort-of a comic, Marvel or DC Comic book pages flipping from top to bottom, I felt a slight punch in my abs. 

The Plot:

Expectations:

Hero is so passionate about Kung-fu (they call it so). Feels his Kung-fu Master his Godfather.  Hero wanders aimlessly and falls for a bieberlicious chick. Couldn’t tolerate the crimes happening in the society, hero turns himself to a masked vigilante. An invincible gang performs series of robberies around the city and a cop is so desperate to catch them. Finally how Mr.Mugamoodi caught the gang, lies the ultimate suspense and surprise in the story.

Reality:

A street kung-fu guy who calls himself Bruce wayne.. sorry Bruce Lee,  gets a boner seeing a gigantic brunette whose IQ level will definitely be topped by a kid at play school. To control his boner and to see her at night, he prepares a rexine suit with the help of a grandpa- wannabe Lucius Fox. On the parallel world, at chennai's Arkham asylum, a guy with serious psychological condition robs the city at night, after watching Heath Ledger’s inevitable performance in ‘The Dark Knight’ from HBO continuously for a month. Along with it, I assume he might have watched ‘The Town’ (masks) and ‘Kung fu Hustle’ (The Axe gang), that makes him pathetically attempt and try uttering dialogues for which even 7-year olds will give a face palm. Meanwhile Commissioner Gordon, yes you are right, Naaser tries to catch this robber. How Mr. Mugamoodi goofs up, spoofs up himself and kills the villain hilariously lies the ultimate idiocracy.

How Mugamoodi could’ve happened:

After watching hell lot of Akira Kurosawa and Takeshi Kitano movies for ‘n’ number of times, Mysskin was desperate to kick some real a$$ in Kollywood. Combining his love and interest for martial arts, voracious reading, comics, super-hero stories, Mysskin in one night stand with a Jack Daniel's whiskey, successfully turned as Ram Gopal Varma of Kollywood (hope you movie buffs can understand what I am trying to say). A script was finally written on a puked tissue stolen from a local bar (which was show in the first song). Names it as a different, off-beat daring attempt.

I don't want to write more about this. Furnishing possible,

Trivia, FAQ’s, assumptions, theories and conclusion from Mugamoodi:

·     No its not a rip off of MGR’s ‘Engal veetu Pillai’. Booo.

·     This film is a dedication to Bruce Lee. No, not to his mysterious death.

·     Nolan’s ‘Batman’ Trilogy DVD can be purchased for the ticket price at Moore Market.

·   If you want to read about tamil super hero stories, go and buy the classic tamil comics ‘Irumbukka Maayavi’ from Rani comics, 3^rd lane, Bunder street, T-Nagar, Chennai.  (Click here to trace in Google maps). Hoooo.

·     Naaser is the Morgan Freeman of south Indian films. But in this flick he fits in the role of Commissioner Gordon, than Lucius Fox.

·    Heroine is the runner up in Miss Universe. Her acting is perfect that she can be casted in Desi/Tamil version of Jersey Shore series yet to be aired in Star Vijay TV.

·     Narain has some serious condition and deep pain in acting after knowing the fact that ‘Heath Ledger’ was dead, post his 'Joker' performance.

·      No, Anguswamy’s character (Narain) was not offered to Actor Santhanam initially.

·      Mysskin fantasized Dark knight climax mating with Spiderman-3 climax for Mugamoodi’s climax.

·     Climax, shot in harbor, 30 kids in a school bus, tied and hanged from a crane, with heroine tied to a rope, villain willingly loses his hand and falling down from the..... WTF !!

·      You may get the Dejavu of Bruce Lee’s Bigboss, Fist of fury etc.. in some shots when one kung-fu guy goes and hits the other guys from his opponent school for insulting his master.

·      Reason for Grandpa Character wearing the Sherlock Holmes suit with funny hat and a pipe in climax, only god knows. (Don’t tell me that he was with the guy from costume department)

·       You will love to watch dubbed super hero movies in theatres after watching Mugamoodi.

·       I ain’t going to a Mysskin movie again unless if its shot in yellow-bulb, dim light.

·     This is what happens when an unstoppable force (experiment subject, dumbness) meets  an immovable object (mass, high budget, crowd pleasing).

·      Oh yes, this guy K makes some good BGM, Seriously.

Further contributions, comments, views, trolls are welcomed. 

For all you people who were fed up watching ‘Mugamoodi’, I suggest you to watch ‘Supermen of Malegaon’. Please do watch it. I assure that your laughing bone and brains will definitely be tingled.

P.S. If someone is offended directly or indirectly in the above post, am.... Dude just STFU, go and watch this movie for 3 hours. You'll understand my pain. 

Aaranya Kaandam in my view – Decoding the meaning of Neo-Noir in Tamil cinema

SPOILER ALERT: If you haven’t watched “Aaranya Kaandam” please do watch it before you read this. This Post cointains the plot and spoilers.  

It all started with elegant posters designed in the style of art-house novel covers, Villupaatu genre trailer of a film winning accolades all over the world. Before starting my review, I want to congratulate and thank the director Thiagarajan Kumararaja for bagging a national award for best debut director with great confidence thus by making a daring attempt.

The name Aaranya Kaandam, English Title: Jungle Chapter, originally denotes a chapter in Ramayanam. That particular chapter tells us about the Raavan’s plot on captivating Sita. Just like Vali’s epic, Ramayana carrying lots of details and references in a historic epic, Thiagarajan Kumararaja has written Aaranya Kaandam well with perfect sense, making one to sit and get locked up tight to the characters and the plot. Thiagarajan has almost made a research for it, I guess. Starting from Jackie shroff, Sampath, Kodukapli, Somasundaram (Chennai Koothupaatarai fame), Ravikrishna and subbu, everbody has lived their roles in Aaranya Kaandam.

The character sketching and schema can be dissected into two groups.

The Predators:

Singam Perumal (Jackie Shroff) – The Lion King.

Gajenthiran, Gajapathi – The Elephant [Gajas].

The Prey:

[Pasu]Pathi - The Cow.

Kaalai (Father) – The Bull.

Kodukapuli (Son) – Puppy Dog /Gambooge literally.

Subbu (The Lady) - The cunning Lady Fox.

Sappa (Ravikrishna) – Pity crow/bird which gets shot unplanned on a stupid hunt.

Plot of AK is crisp and clear. Perfect cut I’d say. It was lovable and easily captivating like a good old childhood fable.

Plot: An old Lion (Singamperumal) and giant elephant (Gajapathi Brothers) ruled the jungle. The cow (Pasupathi) helped the lion by finding its prey thereby gaining its survival. One day in a Jungle the cow suggested lion about consuming a prey (cocaine) that belonged to Elephant. In this situation, Lion disagrees; cow decides to take advantage of the situation, control and position of the old Lion. Lion gets pissed off because of that and decides to kill cow. Becoming aware about this, Cow escapes and accidentally bull (kaalai) and puppy dog (kodukaapuli) gets caught amidst all these chaos. Cow draws a strategy to get back the prey. Executes its successfully by defeating and killing the predators. While all this happening, a beautiful cunning fox (subbu) escapes this wild hunt by placing a pity crow (sappa) as a decoy. Well that’s Aaranya Kaandam is all about.

The racy narration keeps the plot alive and healthy. Even the simple scenes were narrated and acted very naturally. The soul of Aaranya Kaandam lies in the shoulders of characters.

Likes Corner:

There were lot of remarkable/loveable/enjoyable scenes and shots from AK. Particularly,

The conversation amongst the gangsta members on ‘How to get a desperate lady?’.

The Phone call sequences between Gajapathi brothers, Singamperumal, Pasupathi, Kaalai & son were top class.

The way kaalai curse the people during the cockfight and blaspheming about it.

Two autos, BIGLE (Aarya’s auto) & Son of Gun (Villain Vijay’s auto) from Oram po movie directed by Gayathri Pushkar, friends of Thiagarajan Kumarajan, crossing up sappa and subbu accidentally.

Narrating Sappa & Subbu’s situation in the Mario game scene sequence was really loveable. Matching the game’s ending, in the climax subbu walks away with an attitude that shows ‘Middle finger salute’ to the male chauvinistic/dominating society with unspoken words, “Thank You Mario! But Our Princess Is In Another Castle!”

Kaalai trying to keep up his super dad image in front of his son but ends standing as an dumb-ass.

Pasupathi’s strategy and monologue conversation.

The final handshake dialogue between Pasupathi & Kodukapili.

Ohhhhhhhh.. stop me there !! I almost mentioned all the scenes. 

To my fellow world movie lovers & torrent guys:

I’ve read many reviews where people condemning the director as a copy of Guy Ritchie, his narration and screenplay as Tarantinoish one. Seriously, stop it guys!!

Note: Guy Ritchie and Tarantino are not true and original either. Even they have been inspired by lot of good old folks like Sergio Leone, Stanley Kubrick, Spielberg and so many Spaghetti western films, cult films and grindhouse movies. It’s just another dimension of narration and variation in storytelling. They didn’t own the copyright of it.

Quoting all their films like Pulp Fiction, Reservoir dogs, Snatch, Rock’n’Rolla, Revolver, Lock stock and two smoking barrels… and other famous Gangster films like The Godfather, Good fellas, The Usual suspects, Scarface, Donnie Brasco, City of gods etc… everything deals with using profanity, portraying outraged characters, Illegal drugs smuggling, trafficking, killing, chasing and a bloody massacre at the end. Each and every goddamn gangsta movie has it. You cannot call it a copy when a plot is made with such specifications because that’s what they do in their real life and that’s why they are gangsters. Remember Aaranya Kaandam is ‘A day in a gangsta life’. 

To the baldheads who call Aaranya Kaandam as (A) Rated film:

The 80’s generation kids were done watching all the boring melo-drams and family movies all their way up till now. All we need right now in Tamil cinema is (A) movie with true, raw, rusty character portrayal in addition to Bloody action sequences. Seriously, how long u guys want us to get jealous of the foreign films in the name of culture, heritage and tradition. ? Not all loves to see the reality and hear profanity, I agree. But truth should’ve been told and portrayed atleast in some films. Keeping your kid safe from hearing profanity and violence on screen doesn’t make them neither sinners nor saints. Media alone isn't responsible for one’s rude, violent behavior. Well that’s different ball game, I don’t want to break out a debate about it.

Talking about Profanity, AK will be a trend setting movie in tamil cinema for this aspect too. I love the way profanity usage is handled in AK. It was not used on purpose or for the sake of usage but the characters utters it because emotional, angst soul. Always envied its usage in Hollywood and foreign films. Even the Hindi 'Delhi Belly' made me to worry and wonder when such movies will come to tamil. Inspite of those 52 cuts, NOC certificates, (A) certificate from the censor board, Thiagarajan Kumararajan and producer SPB Charan almost made it possible and won battling the censors. SPB Charan truly deserves the credits and success for trusting the script and a new director, backing  up such a great project. 

Last but not least, kudos to the whole team and specially to the camera-man Vinod and Yuvan shankar Raja. They had done a great job. A tamil movie without songs, carried away fully in BGM is truely challenging but yuvan made it possible. The principal photography is fabulous. 

On the whole, Aaranya Kaandam introduced the neo-noir genre in tamil cinema. It will be praised, hailed and referred a decade later just like Anbe sivam, Kattradhu Thamizh and Pudhupettai. Well done Thiagarajan & team. Can't wait for your next movie. Please make it soon.

Feel free to share your opinion and cjeck out this tumblr page created by hardcore AK fans.